One of the main tenets of Tibetan Buddhism is to die before you die. In a culture that is obsessed with not only youth, but immortality, everything that is related to the organic process of vegetation, and dying is held at bay for as long as we can. Our fear of getting older and death has no doubt led to the arrested development of the species. But this post isn’t about the world at large—it’s about me.
Last week, I was, well, attacked on my radio show and while I have had flamers and defamers every now and then, this event was different. It was like a virus. It came in through the back door, which is what viruses do. They distract the corporeal form with some sort of viral noise, something that has to be attended to, then, while the virus is being addressed and dealt with, through the back door, something else is introduced. It’s a genetic sleight-of-hand that’s based on distraction. This is what happened to me last Monday.
I was at the end of what was a very successful show and I took a call with about ten minutes left. The caller came in, and asked me about doing a reading for him around the timing of following his life passion, which was opening a vinyl, record store. I should have known better. His story about being a trampoline repairman seemed odd, but I’ve had some strange jobs, so I soldiered on through the reading, doing my best to give sound advice based on the chart given to me and after I had delivered what I thought was logical council, he turned on me and told me that he had given me the chart of the producer of the Howard Stern Show, Gary Del Abate aka Baba Booey.
I told him that I read the chart and that I didn’t claim to be psychic and then he attacked, frothing, and cursing. There’s a reason why they call it cursing as I felt slightly paralyzed in the moments and days after the event. I began to question what I do and whether or not is/was valid. Was I just another pretender in Holden Caulfield’s parade of phonies? I was questioning my purpose, this in spite of the fact that I have been a very successful astrologer, having done close to over 1200 readings over the past eight years.
There’s been loons and goons that have called in and I’ve flushed them as easily as yesterdays news, why did this particular caller sting me? The answer was simple; my heart was open and my guard was down. When I go into the space of service I lay down my shields and open a channel to myself, and the other. This is what happened last Monday.
Since Jupiter is moving forward towards Uranus in my chart, in my 9th House, getting ready to trine my natal Jupiter in Sag in my first, I’ve been stretching, bending, widening the open heart space as I am convinced that this is the only place of refuge and paradoxically strength for the remaining humans on the planet. This commitment was obviously, seriously, tested. It also spoke to the individual power of the eclipse and the Pluto/Uranus square. Eclipse energies aren’t always felt in the immediate, the now, but days and even weeks after the event, the energies manifest and rise.
A PERSONAL LESSON
Zooming out a bit, well quite a bit from a much more objective space, transiting Mercury was on my South Node in Pisces, which BTW is also on my IC. My South Node and IC is where I do my Piscean work, which is right here in my home. The energy and transmission is broadcast through my NN in Virgo conjunct my MC, also at 15. It collided and colluded with transiting Chiron at 18 also conjunct my IC by three degrees. It was and is the most vulnerable area and time in my chart. While I was busy engaging the world through my Virgoan reach, the virus slipped through the backdoor and for a few days, hacked my faith. But it also did something even more important, it caused me to look at my work and re-assess it. Was I being as effective, dedicated and committed to what I have set out in the ziggurat of this mirrored matrix? Was I living up to my commitments with character and integrity. It was, as they say, a reality check.
Ironically enough, the birth date that the caller used was that of Gary Del’Abate more commonly known as “Baba Booey” producer of the Howard Stern show. Del’Abate is a Pisces, born 3/14/61, his Sun is at 23 degrees, the same degree as my mother’s Piscean Sun.
I’m not going to unwind this thing into some weird Oedipal trip, but there’s always been this sense that my mother wanted some other type of son, one that she could brag about in sound bites to her friends at church and the symphony club. What I do isn’t easy or that explainable to people on a casual level, especially relative strangers in the context of maiden America, keepers of the old dream. I can only imagine how this might be a real challenge for her.
In any case, there are no accidents, even a caller posing as a person in need, then opening cannon fire at close range (I had to drop the Piscean pirate metaphor in here).
I was playing with the Sabian Symbols as it related to this event and here is what I rose to the surface as I engaged with Lynda Hill’s handy, Sabian Symbol Oracle: AN EASTER SUNRISE SERVICE DRAWS A LARGE CROWD
”This degree shows the ability, and the necessity, of being able to rise up after difficulties in one’s life, somewhat like the Phoenix rising from the ashes. One needs to maintain hope and draw together with others who share a sense of faith in the future and in community and the goodness of life. There will be times of spiritual rebirth where you can rise above the failings of the past into new beginnings. Coming out of doubt and despair can lead to a new sense of love, faith and compassion. Join with others in a spirit of joy. There’s a need for unwavering faith in communal spiritual values. Performing deeds with reverence. Communal expressions of faith. Peace rallies. Revivals. The need for faith in a bright future. Devotion. Worship. The phoenix rising from the ashes. “
I thought it was pretty apropos in the context of what I had just experienced, especially as we approach Oestre and the season of re-birth, always one of my favorite times on the planet. What I got out of this was a re-dedication to my craft, art and service through not just astrology, but other channels as well. We’re at a time right now where we’re playing for keeps on Earth. Ever since 9/11/01 we have been inducted into an occult firmament of symbolic assault, proxy wars and the overall degradation of all life forms on this planet, not just the bi-peds who are convinced that they are at the top of the food chain. So instead of crawling back into my Cancerian shell protecting the entry of my 8th House, I did something quite different and relatively conscious which I will share later today on my show.
So thank you pirate caller, agent of chaos, the virus that crawled through the airwaves and became a worm in my Piscean sanctuary. Thank you. You’ve helped me dance with my shadow and emerge emboldened and ready for this next phase/seven-year-cycle which began back in 2008, the genesis of this blog and work. My dedication is even deeper.
For everyone that sent me emails, texts and Skype messages of support, thanks. It means a great deal.