Archive for the “Pop-Cycles” Category

Branded

I’m going to be the guy that pisses in the marshmallow bonfire down by the seaside. Yes, I’m going to take a hard look at a the Russell Brand, brand. He of the mesmerizing, Charlie Manson gaze, the rapier wit and the “fuck you” fashion, almost always adorned with some form of vaguely religious accessorizing. Brand is hitting the big time. He’s a got a bloodline babe on his arm (Jemima Goldsmith) is guest editing “The New Statesman” and is calling for “Revolution.” People are swooning over his grinning broadsides against the establishment. He makes peroxide blonde CNN presenters wet their panties and old guard talking heads like Jeremy Paxman have to jump through his flaming hoops of puckish disregard. We’ll be looking at Brand’s chart and it’s loaded with celestial technology that is clearly the back end of Brand’s, red hot star turn and provided he can make it through the next few months, it will go from shining to blazing. But the question arises, that even if someone has the starry cred at their disposal, does that give them the license or the divine right to distribute their will if it serves an agenda? And even if that’s the case, could they be in the employ of those that clearly understand the power of the chart and key transits at pivotal times in history? In essence, could someone be guiding and exploiting those aspects towards their own end? And would someone like Brand, not only not give a shit, but also embrace it fully, with their own permission? Perhaps by the end of this piece, we’ll find out.

ALL THE RIGHT CONNECTIONS

I remember the first time I saw Brand, it was on MTV. He was hosting an awards show and quite frankly, the only person I thought was as unfunny in a similar role, was Pauly Shore, the dopey, stoner son of Mitzi Shore who somehow managed to convince an entire generation, for just a few, short years, that he was hilarious. Well, you had to get to your 8th or 9th bong load for that level to kick in, because outside of the glazed eyes, Big Mac sauce drooling down your chin set, he wasn’t funny–at all. Brand was a close second.

But somehow, over time, just like how maybe David Koresh went from being a bumbling apprentice to Benjamin Roden, The Branch Davidian daddy, to a fire-breathing, chapter and verse quoting gospel machine, Brand got his chops and evolved into his current persona.

Films like “Forgetting Sarah Marshall” and “Get Me To The Greek” cemented his image in the mind’s eye as a rock star. His claims that he’s fucked nine-women-a-day casts an alpha programming spell over other men and don’t think that women don’t pay attention either.

It’s interesting to chart Brand over the years. His early photos reveal a soft, chubby faced, English lad who claims that he was sexually abused and like many of his Pluto in Libra mates, he suffered from the chaos and fracture of a divorce. Brand claims that his addiction (drugs) can be tied to this phase of his life. Brand’s father is pictured here, heading out of a pub with the late, Amy Winehouse. Ironically, he looks a lot like the guy on his right, Keith Hudson, who is Katy Perry’s father. Hudson is a sort of new-age, Christian preacher, who claims to be a chosen prophet for the end times. He also happens to be a Gemini, just like Brand.

One of the claims of hardcore Christians, is that Satanists and Masons use the Church as a sort of limited hang which gives them superficial legitimacy. As a result, Hudson has been accused by that community of being a false prophet.

Brand went to the famed Italia-Conti Academy of Theater Arts in London. People like Patsy Kensit, Gabriel Anwar, Sadie Frost, Tracey Ullman and Julliana Hough attended there as well. Hough is interesting because she was raised in Utah as a Mormon and not just her, but all of her brothers attended the academy. She left after a year, where according to her, she was “abused, mentally, physically, everything.” She starred in “Rock of Ages” with Brand and is set to star in an upcoming film, also with him called, “Diablo Cody.”

Brand’s physicality has morphed and evolved along with his persona. Here’s an early picture of him, circa 2006 and version 2.0. Some plastic surgeons have noted that Brand has undergone Rhinoplasty, which gives him a slightly bulging, quasi, Cro-Magnon Christ look, with a hint of Jim Morrison (shades only) and the buggy eyes of Charlie Manson. Do you know what’s funny about Charlie Manson? When he first gathered his family members from the human lost and found in Haight Ashbury, circa 1967, he told them that the key to really breaking free was to strip themselves of their conditioning, to go beyond their social programming and shatter the institutional chains that had held them back. Once they did, they could truly be themselves and unlike the rest of the squares, be free.

Forty-years-later, Manson’s rap would’ve gotten a book deal and a spot on Oprah’s couch. Brand, like Manson is calling for “revolution.” There’s even a Beatles connection (of course). Manson’s sonic bible was “The White Album” released on 11/22/68 (Five-year-Kennedy death anniversary). It’s loaded with all kinds of hooks and triggers and Manson took his cues from McCartney’s “Helter Skelter” and Lennon’s “Revolution 1″ and “Revolution 9.”

At the closing ceremonies of the occult olympics in London, Brand was dressed as Willy Wonka. This is a theme not uncommon to him, as he has also donned the garb of the child catcher from Chitty Chitty Bang-Bang, a book written Ian Fleming, yes, that Ian Fleming, who also happened to be one of L. Ron Hubbard’s pals. But I digress just slightly. Brand has a bit of the pied piper in him and he’s playing “Eve of Destruction” on his magic flute.

He sat atop a funky-yellow school bus (Magical Mystery Tour) and sang, “I Am The Walrus” (Lennon). And now Brand is channeling the ghost of Lennon with his situationist rants and screeds, holding a mirror up to the establishment in the same spirit of irreverence that Lennon did. This is not a coincidence and we’ll get into this later as we dissect his chart.

Brand met Katy Perry, first on the set of “Get Me To The Greek” and then again at the 2009 VMA’s, which he hosted. Perry and Joe Perry of Aerosmith performed “We Will Rock You.” The Perry/Perry pairing is yet another Gemini
hyper-meme. The track ends with Katy, not Joe falling at Brand’s feet. From there it was flesh time in Thailand, Paris and India, where Brand popped the question. There have been whispers that Brand was her handler. If you are not familiar with the term “handler” it’s used not just in spy circles, but also when MK Ultra is mentioned.

MK Ultra is a well known mind control program that was practiced by the CIA. It involved a number of methods to crack a person open and get them to do things that would be against their will. Jason Bourne is just one, popular example.

In the late-nineties, early two-thousands, there was a rush of material from women that claimed to have been tortured and repeatedly shown bits and pieces of “The Wizard Of Oz” or “Cinderella” or “Snow White.” Kathy O’Brien, Arizona Wilder and Svali shredded the veil over the topic with accounts that were as nauseating as they were wild. Through trauma and torture, they had their brains compartmentalized and in those personal voids, new personalities were programmed, triggered on demand by keywords with phrases from the fairytale that included their access codes. “The Stepford Wives” written by Ira Levin (Rosemary’s Baby) was a contemporary allegory for this type of programming.

Katy Perry’s name has been associated with the same type of programming confessed by Kathy O’Brien and the others. There is a video on youtube, which shows Brand and Perry on the red carpet and Brand flashes Shepard Fairey’s “Obey” image with a neat pentagram and Perry seems to go into some type of goofy trance.

Brand divorced Perry but wasted no time by dating Perry lookalike, Zooey Deschanel. Again, we have a Gemini theme in action, twins/split personality/duality/polarization. Last year he was with Alesandra Balasz, the stepdaughter of Chelsea “Handler.” Daddy Balasz belongs to the “Quill and Dagger,” Cornell’s equivalent to Skull and Bones. He’s also a massive influence peddler, rubbing shoulders with Madonna, Gaga, and other plugged in Gothamites.

Being that Brand has Uranus squaring Venus, relationships last about as long as the mating cycle of a mayfly. With Venus tied to, yoked to Saturn, we see again, the need, either unconscious or realized for relationship to provide some kind of cover, power. structure and form. Even though he has Saturn in Cancer (fall) Saturn still performs the function of escalation with it’s need to position itself towards the accumulation of form and power. His latest “relationship” with Jemima Goldsmith is yet another example of this in action, another cagey move up the ladder, emotionally ascending, one-step-at-a-time, up the social pyramid.

Jemima is the daughter of Sir Jimmy Goldsmith, a robber baron of the first order, who inherited a fortune from his father, Franck Adolphe Benedict Goldschmidt. Papa Franck was one of the founders of the “King David” hotel, which was bombed by Irgun and became the catalyst for the transfer of British mandate Palestine, to David Ben-Gurion and the Zionist congress, leading to the nation state of Israel.

Jemima is an editor for The New Statesman and fits into the Saturn/Venus upscaling model of trending upwards in relationship in Brand’s life/chart. She was hand-in-glove with Russell’s star turn as the editor of “The New Statesman.” With his editorial piece in place, Brand had bonafides across the board.

A poster on FB claimed that he is a Trojan Horse. The most popular scenatrio is that he has succeeded in slipping beyond the guardians of the establishment, but I would offer that it’s the other way around. I believe that it’s the alternative community that Brand has infiltrated and not vice versa. With his Sun/Merc in Gemini, Brand holds a mirror up to the world and with the Sun/Neptune opposition, the world sees what it wants or perhaps what Brand himself wants the world to see.

RECTIFICATION

My friend, RA DA’COSMOPHYXIAN has clued me into the power of the rectification as it relates to to the birth chart. Now Ra and I might disagree on the frequency of rectification, but I agree, that in certain cases, even when the birth time is known, that it might behoove a closer look. Brand is said to have been born at midnight on 6/4/75. This is slightly suspect to me as rarely, in all the years I have been doing charts, I have seldom seen a birth exactly at the top of the hour. Not saying it can’t happen, it just doesn’t fly with any sort of frequency. In fact, in the hustle and bustle of birth, there can at times be a rounding off of the birth time. So there’s a possibility that Brand was born either just before or just after midnight, I’m getting 12:03 AM, which would put him at 27 Cap, ASC., I originally thought he was at 29 degrees, but that would have put his birth time out to around 12:08, thus pushing it closer to 12:10, which would have generally been the rounded off number. 27 degrees on the DSC also fits, because that’s where his tortured Venus resides. In astrology, we read for the next house if a planet is within five degrees of that house. So, technically, Brand’s Venus is in the 7th, however, from a purely symbolic perspective, It’s like Venus cannot make the journey home, to where it’s accidentally exalted.

So with Cap on the ASC and his first house mostly Aquarius we see both the establishment (Capricorn) and the dawn of a new day (Aquarius); the old guard and the new wave. Lurking in Brand’s 12th is mighty Pluto in Capricorn in transit. We are talking behind the scenes power. Pluto in Cap is the rise of corporatocracy, banking and Baphomet. Having a Pluto transit in the 12th is no bullshit as it makes the individual deal with temptation and power. There are forces behind the scene at work in Brand’s life. Do they serve his best interests and the greater good, or do they feed him and his dark, occult practices, spell-binding which the likes of Katy Perry and millions more struggle to awaken from?

Remember when Brand was singing John Lennon at the olympics? This is important to note. Brand forms an unholy trinity of sorts with two, other fiery iconoclasts of British shock and raw. I’m talking Lennon and John Lydon, aka Johnny Rotten. Together, Lennon/Lydon/Brand complete the grand air trine of Libra (Lennon), Aquarius (Lydon) and Gemini (Brand). With transiting Uranus on his natal Mars, he’s on fire. Jupiter conjunct Mars in the natal chart, especially in Aries gives the individual an abundant amount of will power. One of the things that people like about him is his ability to speak his mind without having much filter and because he’s bright, it sounds both funny, insightful and legit. Most people with no or little filter can shoot their mouth off and it can get them in trouble, Brand seems to have remedied this by having the lightning fast trine from Mercury to Uranus. He’s quick on the uptake. But Gemini also represents duality and duplicity. Is Brand really “down with the people” or as his history and associations suggest, might actually be moonlighting for the kabal as the pied piper of the revolution?

With Chiron in Aries in the 2nd House, I’d say that Brand’s well publicized appetite for the ladies can be seen here. Chiron in Aries in the second reeks of over compensation. Remember, Brand has a history of abuse and based on that Chiron, I’m betting that it’s not the hot babysitter that wanted to initiate him into the joy of sex. Aries = the male principle. Is his womanizing a frenzied effort to cover up and somehow reinforce some male part of himself that manifests as the chronic wound? I’m sure he would have some glib comment at the ready, but it’s just a notice in the chart.

Another notice is that Brand has no Earth in his chart, other than his CAP ASC. He isn’t grounded at all and is in someways, the embodiment of the magical puer.

Revolutions are not always in the best interests of the people. The Bolshevik Revolution was a bloody affair and the accounts of what took place are not for the faint of heart. Orthodox priests were boiled alive and their charges were forced to drink what was in essence, human soup. That’s just one, brutal scene from that incredibly macabre and chilling epoch in human history. Mother Russia was thrust into darkness, paranoia and poverty as a result.

The aristocrats of France, the one’s who had the greatest chance of dealing with the rise of the banking families like the Goldschmidts and the Rothschilds were wiped out under the hue and cry of liberte! Under the guise of change new models are slipped in, almost like a virus. I am not one for the status quo, but I am also not going to start marching behind the likes of Brand and his pal, Gemini, Daniel Pinchbeck, just because they’re cool, or funny, or outrageous, irreverent and took the right drugs. Just because one has gulped Ayahuasca, doesn’t mean their soul is clean.

But at the end of the day, Brand is a global warmer, a gun controller and yet another false prophet dealing in Tavistock in trade social schema and ideologies, just like the Fab Four and Lennon/McCarthy did in the 60′s.

Brand needs to be very careful as well in the months to come as transiting Pluto in the 12th will square his natal Mars, which will still be hot and firing with the energy of Uranus. That’s a potentially violent and deadly aspect. Is it more than just ironic that Brand resembles Che Guevara and Jesus? Will he be martyred for some greater cause? Because when we’re talking about revolution, one’s life is a small price to pay for the greater good!

If Brand makes it through the Pluto/Mars square, he’ll have Uranus conjuncting his Jupiter and the potential real, electrifying insight is there. He’ll also wind up revising much of what he believes in when Saturn moves into Sag and conjuncts his Neptune in the 10th in 2015. Perhaps then, at that point, he’ll realize that the most revolutionary thing he could do would be to cut his hair, get married, have a child and continue to shock people with an enlightened normalcy that would take real courage to literally and figuratively, recreate his brand.

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Reel-to-Real

Each summer, Hollywood delivers it Blockbusters usually in the action/sci-fi genre.Typical, format of these films are a diverse random group coming together as a team to defeat a controlling force with evil sinister intentions.

Many look towards the 1977 classic ‘Star Wars’ as being the initial if accidental Summer Blockbuster that all others attempt to follow in terms of cutting-edge expensive graphics leading to a even greater profit in Tickets purchased at the Cinema connected with Merchandise.

Like many things in Pop Culture, things are based in collective opinion rather than fact.
The actual first genuine Hollywood Film to attain Summer Blockbuster status was ‘Jaws’ in 1975 directed by Steven Spielberg. What made ‘Jaws’ so unique was people went repeatedly, taking those to the Cinema to be converted. This behaviour had never been witnessed to that extent before in western developed world cultural history. Eventually leading to George Lucas, Spielberg’s friend in 1985 becoming a billionaire.

The 38th summer since ‘Jaws’ has produced the evolution of the Hollywood Summer Blockbuster… Read the rest of this entry »

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Sanctuary

It’s Sunday morning and the Moon is revving up to it’s fullness in Aquarius. When I think of the Aquarian full Moon, the one word that comes to mind is “illumination.” My son has just discovered technology and he’s skipping me pictures that he’s taking from his ipod. They’re odd pictures. destinations of exotic locales that are dripping with water or mysteriously deep in the Earth. There’s Isla Espiritu Santu in Baja. Isla De Ometepe in Nicaragua. Antelope Canyon in Arizona. Plitvice Lakes in Croatia. Why is he sending me these pictures? Is he channeling safe zones in the midst of some upcoming cataclysm? I’m struck by the beauty of each image, even though they are awkwardly framed.

As the morning dissolves I shift into doing a coaching session. I’m talking to my client about Saturn transiting the 8th House and how it impacted me. It’s when my son was born. I have Cancer in my 8th and the issues of birth, nurturing, home and family hit me square in the third eye. We moved into a house and a week later we found out we were pregnant. Saturn wastes no time. It’s efficient as hell, if hell can be efficient.

During that time, I couldn’t shake the interview that Bill Moyers did with Joseph Campbell. Campbell talked about becoming a parent, about how when a child is born, the parent dies. This was my metaphorical reality during that Saturn transit. I left my corporate gig and turned my back on transfer to New York City, knowing that it is the devil’s playground for me and wasn’t a good mix with a newborn in my life. I wound up becoming a stay-at-home-dad for two years. Saturn did it’s thing.

As I shared this with my client going through their own Saturn 8th House transit, my son decided to Skype me. There he was, showing up in the session, almost telepathically keyed in. I thought about those pictures just a little bit differently. What was he picking up on?

Saturn is transiting his 4th House–intimations of where it is that might be safe.

We’re occupying a strange zone of flatness and placidity. But for how long, we can’t be sure. There are rumblings on the horizon. It’s rumored that five states (Pennsylvania, West Virginia, Virginia, Delaware and Maryland) in FEMA Region 3 will be having massive drills in late September, early October. We’re talking big, with Mers Coronavirus chatter, UN troops, National Guard, etc., etc.. Meanwhile, the rest of the country will be participating, whether they like it or not in a massive blackout/simulated cyber and physical attack will take place in early November called, “Grid X II”. The track record of drills isn’t a good one; 911, 7/7, Sandy Hook and the Boston Marathon ALL took place during drills. All of that is looming darkly on the event horizon.

In the early part of November, we’ll be staring down a perfect celestial storm with the next Pluto/Uranus square at 9 degrees (endings), a hybrid solar eclipse, which does travel across the face of the U.S., that old devil, Mercury Retrograde in Scorpio and of course, Comet ISON (SION) which looks like a weird spacecraft with the Hubble lens removed. Couple this with our above news and the fact that apparently the underground bases and cities are stuffed, stocked and ready to be occupied, it looks as though 2013 is going to get very interesting over the next sixty days.

Meanwhile, the sweet nectar of Cancer occupying the effulgent spaces of Jupiter. I marvel at the thick and full beards of major league ballplayers recalling players from another time, the ghosts of “The Reconstruction” incarnating in the game they made popular at the end of the 19th century.

Beards are also psychic antenna, connecting men within a circle, a tribe or a diamond with a closer sense of purpose, a more unified field. This makes a lot of sense since we’re dealing with players that mostly range from twenty-two to thirty, the sweet spot of Pluto in Scorpio, the most psychic generation of our time.

Restaurants, bars and ice creameries across the country are rapidly being transformed by artisanal cheeses, fresh, grass fed, humanely raised, organic meats, lush organic fruits and veggies, and the sweet cream of gentle goats and cows. The farm-to-table trend is rapidly ascending in the monolithic shadow of the GMO leviathan. This is Jupiter in Cancer giving us the promise and the scent of what it could be like if we lived in a slower world, where people took time to carefully and lovingly produce the best foods and tastes that honor every seed, leaf, herb and animal. We are so close that we can taste a renaissance rising like loaves of bread from ancient grains, before they changed the molecular structure of wheat. This is the fruit and promise of a world in which we can live, where all of life is honored and not desiccated and desecrated. It also poses the biggest threat to TPTW, because once people get reconnected to the roots of their diet and a lifestyle that accompanies it, it takes us out of the synthetic trance that has become a social dominator. It reminds us of what it is like to be home, a home that exists inside each of us.

Once people get a taste of this type of life, they will defend it because it has become part of them.

There’s some backlash, a bit of snobbery surrounding the farm-to-table lifestyle; It’s elite and overpriced. While you pay more for something hand crafted and local, something alchemical happens. You feel good about what you just purchased or even traded. There’s something whole and resonant that takes place. That powered is even doubled when you make things yourself. When I was living in Point Richmond, there was a place that was teaching people how to craft their own soaps, essential oils, shampoos, etc., and it was rapidly gaining in popularity. There’s a major movement taking place, a turning away from corporate dominance, artificial culture and plastic consumption. News that McDonald’s has strange, Morgellons-like fibers in their chicken McNuggets only helps the cause. We’re in a revolution right now and it’s not taking place in the streets, or on universities but in cafes, diners, restaurants, farmers markets and local farms. There is a consciousness that’s arising that tastes good, feels good and nurtures the spirit. It’s popular to talk about the divine feminine these days, well here it is in action, from farm-to-table, from soil-to-soul. Jupiter in Cancer calling us home.

Speaking of revolution . . .

The Aquarian Full Moon is interesting. Right now, as I bang out this post, I’m IM’ed by a FB friend, a woman who wants to post something on my page about “reality magic” and how women that don’t have a corporate gig might want to re-define themselves. She’s got a heavily tilted, Aquarian chart so this makes perfect sense. In it’s most dire manifestation of the opposition, it’s the arrogant patriarchy versus the radical feministas. The Aquarian Moon is cool, even a bit clinical at times. How do the Sun and the Moon play nice? How does Morgan LaFey dance with King Arthur? The Aquarian Moon jolts our awareness. It illuminates our outgrown ego structures and allows us to innovate, make improvements add a strange magic to the Apollonian strength of our solar expression. We have a desire to communicate how we feel in socially networked matrices. Twitter and Facebook will be shot through with lightning bolts of strange, erratic and inspired invention. No idea is too strange to be tried on or stretched out. The Aquarian Moon desires to be heard. She is the prophetess and the oracle The Sun allows her presence. He gives her space in the days when she burns bright. In the solidity and patience of the Sun, she confers gifts, wisdom and messages. Here is how we embrace the energy. The Aquarian Moon feels settled when this occurs, but more importantly, feels recognized and centered. Deeper uncoiling occurs. The moral of the story? Take a madwoman to lunch at a farm-to-table roadhouse and let her read palms for the food.

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Battle Royale!!!

Sitting in the middle of the country, it seems like I can get a bird’s eye view of the extremities crashing in on magnetic waves from the left and right coasts. Being smack dab in the middle is perhaps more metaphoric realism than I can handle.

Just this past week, Rob Brezsny posted this on Facebook; “”As much as we might be dismayed by the actions of our political leaders, I hypothesize that toppling any particular junta, clique, or elite is irrelevant unless we also overthrow the sour, puckered mass hallucination that is mistakenly called “reality,” including the part of that hallucination we foster in ourselves. The revolution begins at home. If you overthrow yourself again and again, you might earn the right to help overthrow the rest of us.”

Sounds great and golly wonderful on the surface, but I’ve heard this refrain from Brezsny before. He never wants to get his hands dirty or sullied when it comes naming perps, pointing out obvious agendas or stopping liars in their tracks. It’s this kind of spiritual solipsism that I couldn’t wait to get away fast enough from in California.

Since I’ve heard it from Rob before, or some variation of it, it feels like he’s saying, “There’s nothing you can do about it, so you might as well just do that rigorous navel gazing often defined as “inner work.” It reeks of a type of spiritual impotence masquerading as sage wisdom. Overthrow your own stifling regime first. That sounds great, but what does it mean and when are we supposedly ready to get back to the business of re-claiming the world from the psychopaths that snatched it from us?

Brezsny isn’t alone. I’ve heard variations on the theme from the likes of Mark Morford and Caroline Casey.

They don’t or won’t tackle the knotty issues of our time, like Chemtrails, 911 and the thorny rise of a totalitarian state through excessive debt that’s used as massive leverage against countries, including this one. But Rob, in particular chooses to deflect any type of focused attention on these subjects.

Meanwhile, in New York, the art-damaged millennial, Damien Crisp and I got into it on FB. Crisp apparently is some kind of well known Occupier. Unlike Brezsny, he’s down for revolution. He stands with the people of the the world in their urgent struggle against corporations and militarized tyranny. Like Rob’s taoist dictum, it sounds good on the surface, but drill down a little and you’ll find out that Crisp hates the USA and wants to see it fail and fall as the USA and it’s policies are the reason why the world is such a dreadful mess. I told him that it’s a planned demolition and the desecration of the county was a conscious manipulation, a poison PR, toxifying the global perspective of the USA so when it goes down in flames, people won’t care and will even cheer it on. I also told him to be careful what he wished for, because he might get it and the result might be even worse than the rapid free fall we’re in now.

Unlike Brezsny, he’s game for just about anything, unfortunately, he has no grounding on who did what, when and why. He’s never heard of the “Creature From Jeckyl Island,” Col. House, Bernard Baruch and the “Hell Bomb” or the dark networks that have intertwined and coiled like serpents together over the folds of history.

He wasn’t interested in these “theories.”

I’ve encountered this before with the so-called, turned on left. They never want to know names, or dates, or histories, or internecine connections. They’re much more comfortable with broad and monolithic labels like, “The Oligarchy,” “The Elite,” and now, “The One Percent.” Never mind who they are.

Crisp was just interested in ripping apart the top-down structure–that’s it.

So on side of the country there’s Rob Breszny whose only call to action is inaction and on the other, there’s Crisp who is ready to throw down, but only if it’s global nihilism with a Marxist twist..

So I decided that it would probably be best if all three of us had a cage match to determine whose overarching theory of how to save the world while ridding it of it’s evil scourge would win. I think it would go something like this.

Brezsny would show up in a pink, one piece wrestling leotard with a hole cut out for the navel, because that’s where he would place a diamond sutra. He’d have to wear Chuck Taylor’s and some of those old 3D glasses from the 50′s for ironic effect.

Crisp would no doubt agonize over his choice of attire, wanting it to be a statement of some sort, but not too much so that he could then be accused of some sort affected hipsterism. He’d probably show up in a pair of leather Gucci shorts that he would have torn, burnt and peed on as some sort of anti-corporate statement. I think he’d probably have his entire body given a Brazilian wax, so that he could stand in solidarity with the people of Sao Paolo.

Of course, I’d have to wear a pair of Ben Davis overalls, because they’re still made in America, but I’d also have to wear a hemp t-shirt underneath, just let people know that I have some alternative cred as well. I’d also have to shave my head because somebody has to be the bad guy and besides, I wouldn’t want Crisp to pull my hair.

Here’s how the epic, battle royal would go down. I think Rob and I would go at it, pummeling our well worn, middle aged bodies into the canvas of oblivion. But I think I can take Rob. My inner redneck is crazier than his inner bolshevik and I have Mars square Sun, which is thermonuclear when activated. While Rob and I are duking it out, Crisp will be Occupying the turnbuckle.

Just as i am about to put Brezsny into an iron-cross-hammer-lock, the same one that the Tibetans taught Hitler’s officers, Crisp flies off the turnbuckle, spouting Derrida, as he jumps onto my back like a jackal. Of course, while he’s going after me, Breszny recovers and is teaming up with Crisp, because if you go far enough to the edge of any extreme, they’ll both meet up and then do some sort of sweaty, ideological man hug thing.

It’s not looking good for yours truly, but just about the time when Crisp is going rip my overalls off me as sort of some symbolic gesture, there’s a flash of light and before us, Jesus appears. Although it looks a lot more like SiStar MyRah than Jesus, much to the surprise of the viewing audience.

SiStar MyRah tells us to stop–we do. Then she says that, “We’re just a by-product of strategy set up to divide and conquer all of us and that we should work together to defeat the real evil on the planet.”

Dumbfounded and in awe of this miracle, we shake our heads yes. “Okay then” she says, “Let’s make it happen!

Before we know it, right before our very eyes, the forces of evil are summoned to do battle with us, right there, right then. It’s kind of like that old Star Trek episode where Kirk, Spock, Abe Lincoln and some famous Vulcan have to fight the most evil men of the universe throughout all time on a neutral planet, refereed by an alien that looks like a giant clump of dogshit with Christmas lights.

There before us are Dick Cheney, Hilary Clinton, Benjamin Netenyahu and Bill Gates. In theory, the only one I’m worried about is Bibi, since I know he’s got some badass Kravmaga training from his IDF days.

I remind SiStar MyRah that there’s four of them and just three of us. She says don’t worry, I’ve added another member to your team. I look to my left and it’s David Wilcock! SisTar MyRah says, “I tried to find a woman to fight Hilary, but David was as close as I could get.” She also tells me that it’s been nearly ten days since Hilary’s last botox treatment and that all we have to do is hold a mirror up to her and she’ll go into full on Medusa mode.

I look at Cheney and he might not be as much of a pushover as we think. In fact, he has a new heart and the dark rumor is that it’s Trayvon Martin’s. That’s the last thing we need; the heart of an angry, young, black male whose was life was cut short. If it’s true, Cheney could be trouble. Now he supposedly has a member the size of Delaware and I doubt that even the most sophisticated supporters could hold that in.

I tell Breszny to go to the dragon’s head, because that’s where he’ll defeat the beast. Luckily, Wilcock had been working on a hyperbolic refractor that doubles as a mirror and he brought it with him. Snakes ahoy!

I mention to Crisp that Gates could be a lot more dangerous than he appears. He might have a few shots of some wicked ass vaccines hidden in his boot.

It looks like I get Bibi. I’m already exhausted from the previous match so I have to think fast. I look into the audience and there’s a hot dog vendor. I ask him if the hot dog is beef or pork and he says “pork.” Hallelujah! I grab it and brandish it right in from of Bibi’s grill. He steps backwards. It’s like kryptonite. This flaccid bludgeon of porcine menace has become my excalibur! I’m slapping Bibi in the face repeatedly with it. He’s helpless–can’t do a thing. It’s so bad, it’s like a scene from the Three Stooges and I’m Moe and he’s Curly. I’m just about to plunge the sweaty dog right into his third eye and all of sudden it’s grabbed right out of my hand by Crisp flashing a wicked grin! I’m not sure if he’s a double agent or is so hell bent on America’s destruction that like the scorpion and the frog, he just can’t help himself.

Well, by now, Bibi has recovered and summoned a 3,000 year-old Babylonian demon to finish me off. It looks bad. Lights out for America. And then I hear Breszny, “Just surrender man.” And that’s what I do. I lay back on the canvas and await my fate and just when the demon is about suck my soul dry, they all disappear–every single one of them–except SiStar MyRah. She says to me, “Robert this was all for you. All of it. You created every single one of them. Even me. And now that you let go of the struggle and the fight, they have dissolved and now I will go as well. But remember you couldn’t get here without the struggle.” And I ask, “What about them, did they get the same lesson too.” She replied, “it doesn’t matter because you’re free now and they don’t even exist. Oh and one other thing. Drop the hot dogs. Your blood pressure is 140 over 99.” And with that, she was gone.

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It’s his nature.

There are some movies that reflect magickal principles and symbols in very direct fashion. “The Game” with Michael Douglas immediately comes to mind as a cinematic meditation on the “Tower” card. “Faceoff” with Nicholas Cage and John Travolta is pure Gemini, with crossed identities, switched faces, duality, good vs evil, etc.. “Back To The Future” is pure, Mercury Retrograde involving time travel and going back in time to set things right for McFly’s parents. But I have never seen a film with such a deeply embedded astrological theme, from start-to-finish, even channeling the sign of the lead actor. The film is “Drive” starring Ryan Gosling and the sign that drives the narrative, from start-to-finish is Scorpio.

First off, Gosling is a Scorpio (11/12/80). Gosling’s Scorpio Sun is conjunct Uranus in Scorpio, giving him access to the fully explosive character he plays in “Drive.” In fact, he has no name and is simply known as “Driver.”

Gosling doesn’t speak much. Instead, he lets his driving do all the talking, which is fast, violent and crafty. By day, he’s a film stunt driver and part time mechanic. By night, he’s a get-a-away driver for petty thieves. In essence, he has one foot in this world, the other in the underworld. In fact, he works for a part-time hood known as “Shannon” played by Bryan Cranston who has connections with two, Jewish gangsters played by Albert Brooks and Ron Perlman. Funnyman Brooks is totally chilling as the avuncular Hollywood producer who slits throats like he’s gutting a trout.

Gosling sports a windbreaker with a scorpion on the back, just in case you’re not getting it. And like a true Scorpio, he’s not halfway. Gosling’s character is all in and whether he’s smashing a hoodlums fingers with hammer, or be-friending the mother and kid down the hall, he’s fully present, intense and loyal. Scorpio gets a bad rap sometimes, but their loyalty is unquestioned.

One of the great scenes in the film is when Gosling takes a joyride with the mother and the son he’s be-friended through LA’s aqueducts. Again, it’s a Scorpionic detail that some people might miss as the water represents his contact with his emotions and its in a car; motion/emotion.

Oh yeah, did I mention that Gosling’s character is violent? In fact he’s so violent that in a scene where he’s protecting the mother, beautifully portrayed by Carey Mulligan, that he goes way beyond merely warding off the bad guys. Driver spends an uncomfortably long time getting crushing sounds out of the bad dude’s head.

This film has a bit of Scorcese’s Taxi Driver in it. Gosling’s Driver is corrupt in that he helps bad guys getaway, but he also has a fixed morality that borders on overcompensation.

Near the end of the film, he utters a line about the scorpion and the frog and how the scorpion cannot help himself, that’s it’s his nature to destroy.

Gosling himself has a bit of an interesting background. He came through the Disney factory which has produced a stable of manipulated child stars. Is scorpion prince of them? If “Drive” is any indicator of what lurks in his soul, I wouldn’t want to be anywhere near him if his programming breaks down.

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Calling all Mars.

So Lance Armstrong is confessing to the black popess of daytime TV. He should be talking with SiStar Myrah instead. If he wants to come clean, let him get some real sanctification. By the way, if you’ve never heard my interview with SiStar Myrah about the Super Bowl rituals, it’s a must listen and you can hear it here. Speaking of Super Bowls, we’re approaching what’s becoming the most unholiest of Sundays. Last year, we witnessed the blatant summoning of Isis in the guise of Ma-don-na. These performance rituals in February set the tone for the rest of the year, with Ma-don-na at Lucas/Lucifer field in Indianapolis. Keep in mind, that while the ma-terial girl was busy shakin’ her ass and grinding underneath the gaze of the all-seeing-eye, Egypt was in flames, half way into it’s so called revolution. As Ma-don-na transformed into Isis, half way around the world, where Isis once landed from a distant star, that country was in turmoil and upheaval.

The two teams were the Giants vs. The Patriots and we explored the theme of the Giants as Elohim or the giant race and the Patriots as the patriarchal symbol of the USA. The giants from heaven, the giants of Wall Street, the giants of a race from another time reborn were now in our midst. And who won the World Series? The San Francisco Giants. So that brings us to this Super Bowl, even if we’re not quite there yet. Let’s trip down a rabbit hole shall we?

There are four teams left; the aforementioned Patriots, the Ravens, the Falcons and the Forty-Niners. It’s important to note where these teams are from and what they stand for amidst the current milieu of our time. The two teams that stand out the most for me are the Patriots (always a handy cipher thanks to Bob Kraft/Craft) and the Falcons from Atlanta. Why these two teams? Well, if you haven’t noticed it yet, America is about 2-3 edgy events away from a full tilt boogie in the streets. Abraham Lincoln, er I mean Obama is about to throw down the gauntlet on gun control and make those “tough choices” for a country that’s almost split as far and wide as you can get without a Mason-Dixon line separating the red from the blue, the black from the white, the left from the right. We are in the cyclonic vortex of polarization, many thanks due in part to Jupiter retro in Gemini exploiting the widening rift, the deepening of the psychological breach between one people, nation under God. If you think Sandy Hook has something to do with this, you’re right, because now, as it stands, it’s punched a hole through the collective credibility membrane and is whiplashing around the psyche. You’ve got Gene Rosen crying to anyone who’ll listen (without a tear of course) that he’s being harassed by “conspiracy theorists.” Well troll the mainstream message boards and you’ll see Uncle Gene getting all kinds of support and love with outrage and venom spitting back at anyone who would dare question his ever-changing story. But go a little deeper and you’ll see waves of disbelief swelling like storm forming just beyond the event horizon. The mass NLP is wearing off. People are waking up–trust me on this.

So we have Obama as Lincoln, from the north getting ready to throw down on the Southern mentality of secession, independence and gun culture. What team most represents that meme, that’s still left? It’s the Falcons from Atlanta, where the south took one of its worst beatings; in fact the whole damn place was nearly burned to the ground. So it would make a lot of sense from a meta-level for the Yankee north (Patriots) to flatten the rebel south, down in Nawlins, with Beyoncé movin’ her booty in voodoo ground central, likely under the set and setting of one Es Devlin, art director for Jay-Z, Kanye, Gaga, Muse and the illuminati in general. One month later, Beyoncé will fly north and sing at the inauguration where Lincoln I mean Obama, will be sworn in once again with Lincoln’s bible.

Just one astrologer’s take on these things.

This doesn’t bode well for my Niners I’m afraid. You might recall that I posted extensively about Colin Kaepernick. If you managed to catch last Saturday’s game against the Packers, Kaepernick took it over in a way that I have almost never seen in a pro-football game. He was more like Michael Jordan or Magic or Bird in the way he single-handedly won the game in such a dominating fashion. This usually does not happen in football, the ultimate team sport and there he was, gashing the Packers in a game that made Aaron Rodgers, the best QB in the league, look, well, pretty average. It was jaw dropping. So much in fact that after the game, the studio crew with Terry Bradshaw, Howie Long, Mike Strahan and Jimmy Johnson looked like they had just witnessed the massacre of the game they once knew. Colin Kapernick became a quantum agent of change.

There is something really past life driven between Kaepernick and his coach, Jim Harbaugh. These two have seen the plains of battle together, before and I am guessing, Rome, soldiers, gladiators, Sparta. Kaepernick is on the record that he is fascinated with Rome and gladiators. His foster mother has given him a Roman coin he wears around his neck. He has Moon conjunct the TN in Aries (god of war) and Jupiter in Aries as well, trine Uranus in Sag. His birth mother is Italian and her last name is “Russo” which means red, color of Mars, again god of war and get this; the guy who calls his plays, the offensive coordinator, is named, Greg Roman.

But Kaepernick is no pagan, he’s a devout Christian and his body is illustrated with biblical verse. There’s something meta-magical happening here and I’m wondering if there is some sort of set-up taking place. Kaepernick is on the latest cover of Sports Illustrated (generally considered a curse). Check out this cover for a moment. Notice the red/Martian theme in the foreground and background too. Notice Red Sox story at the top of the issue. Then there’s the mystic 7 and the “Holy” association with Kaepernick and his rippling scripture. Then there’s this weird diminution of Harbaugh, his coach, a cutout talking head, palsied ingloriously close to Kaepernick’s hindquarters. It’s rather strange and I fear it’s a set-up for a fall this Sunday in the new Atlantis. The Sun will be at 0 degrees Aquarius game time and the Falcons are loaded with Aquarian stars in Julio Jones, Michael Turner and Jacquizz Rodgers. Matt Ryan has Jupiter in Aquarius and Mars in Gemini, which will be in the first house at game time. The Moon will be in Taurus, which will conjunct not only Ryan’s Sun abut Moon as well. It will oppose Kaepernick’s Sun and the last time this happened, the Niners got beat down in Seattle in a cold and dreary nightmare of a game. For SF to win, they’ll need their own Aquarian heroes to shine. That would be Vernon Davis and the enigmatic Randy Moss. Most pundits are salivating over Harbaugh vs Belichick, but it’s feeling like the gods of Olympus will move the chess pieces wherever they deem most important to their galactic fancies and whims as passion plays loaded with symbolism for the feeble minds of man.

We’ll see.

How about you though? What does 2103 have in store for you and your sign? How will the gods of mercy and fate smile upon your sweet brow of the next turn of the Gregorian cycle? In the year of the great culling, snake skin shedding, death and rebirth, the year of the phoenix in the flames of lives and nations burning, will you be whistling dixie or tap dancing on the grave of the self that no longer serves a paradigm of obedience and sleep. Let’s find out, shall we?

ARIES

You’re one of the gang of four this year, part of the cardinal cross bearers (You, Cancer, Cap and Libra). As a result life challenges you on your most basic strategy; action. One of the things that you’re going to learn, in spite of the quantum acceleration of Uranus, is that you cannot complete your mission alone. Its like calling in the four directions; South for home, east for relations, north for elders and wisdom of the tribe. As painful as it might be to realize that you are not Sarah Conner in this turn of the great wheel, it’s also extremely empowering to know that the people you’ll meet along the way this coming year will also have gaps and chunks that they need to fill and build out. This is never more apparent than this summer, when it feels like the world around you is stopping, slowing down into its component parts of a fractal dream. Out of the deceleration, you begin to ponder things like home, in not just a physical sense, but also a more abstract existential quest for the place inside that you can return to again and again and renew your hopes, dreams and aspirations. Dare I say that there will be a softening of sorts around your rugged and efficient exterior? While you might take some time out to contemplate your true north, it by no means, means that there is s full stop headed your way, not with Uranus and it’s hyper-dimensional ripple effect. You are a point of contact for radical solutions and rapid innovation. February is a launching pad, a point of trajectory where you’ll take on big picture projects and spend the rest of the year refining the results. New ways of communicating had sharing information should be at the top of your list. April is when you put it all on the line and have to deal with being unpopular with co-workers for a dramatic decision. May, the dust settles and the rest of your body will need some time to catch up with the central nervous system. November has you dealing deeply with issues of legacy; your own and shadows from your past. The inner sky cracks open and the rain of grief finally falls upon your parched spirit. Long held grudges and grievances melt away and allow you to face the future in 2014 with an even greater sense of possibility and destiny. The overall theme of the year? Hit the gas on straightaways when you can, but bring plenty of change for the toll roads ahead.

TAURUS

Now that Saturn has swung into your opposite sign, life has your attention–doesn’t it? Well the fun is just starting. Your mission in 2013 is to be on your toes; Think cows in tutus doing ballet kind of on your toes. Now did that get your attention? So how does a cow do a proper cabriole? I’ll tell you how–they get in shape first before they even attempt it. That, my dear sweet bull is the first order of 2013 for you. Going to the gym is okay, but you need something more, deeper and ultimately a way to link body and psyche together in perfect somatic synchrony. Yoga is good, but make sure you can do it outdoors if you can so that you can tap into nature’s energy fields. But more importantly, this is the year you need to dance. It doesn’t matter if it’s Zumba or Rhumba, Afro-Caribbean or Pleiadian, just get it in gear and go as deep as you can with your observations of your explorations. Note how your body changes and your dreams shift when you hit walls or reach peaks. Yes, I’m challenging you to achieve and go places you’ve never been or re-visit them years later. And guess what happens when you dance? You meet people. You find a partner that synchronizes with you on the dance floor and the bedroom. Why do think I’m recommending dancing? It’s time for you to fuse with another; to link your DNA in an ecstatic entanglement of Eros inspired enlightenment. Yes, in 2013, you could experience the tantra of realization. Now in order to do this, I advise you to pick your partner carefully. If you’re already in a committed relationship, Saturn will flesh out how much life it has left in it. Saturn is not Pluto. Saturn is the lord of recycling and not just karmic bitchslaps. You can re-invest in your most primary relationships vis-a-vis Saturn in Scorpio and since you are a shrewd judge of value, you’ll know exactly how much and where needs to be applied, but it is YOU that must do it, not the other way around. Two major eclipses play a role for you in 2013. The first, in May gets your attention in a big way. Think shortages and planning for the future. If you do it right, the next one in November won’t knock you off the grid for good. Oh yeah, this Summer, if you don’t grow a garden, you’re missing out on not only some record fruits and veggies, but a back-story about nature and the interconnectedness of all things, that will frankly blow you away.

GEMINI

The high on nitrous, merry-go-round with day glo cotton candy isn’t about to stop just yet, but I will tell you that it’s getting ready to go in the right direction if you even care at this point–it’s all gonna wind up in your memoirs anyway. But lets slow down a bit and take a step back. Right now, if I were your astral-homeopath, I’d recommend thing like magnesium oil, silica, Epsom salts, food grade diatomaceous earth, cell salts and drops of high grade, ionic silver. Why? Because your central nervous system has taken a beating in the past few months and you need those things to soothe and cool the fiery tips of your neural receptors. All these goodies would not only ground you and reinforce the myelin sheaths, but they would help fine-tune your greatest asset–the crystal transceiver between your ears. You don’t need some kind of AI upgrade as much as Verizon would like you to think–you just need to reinforce what you already have and perfect it’s crystalline essence. While the early part of 2013 is filled with ideas and inspirations crackling like a lightning storm around your crown, the energy shifts on the solstice and you get the call to ground it all. This is a twelve-month-cycle that allows you to give birth to your wildest dreams and schemes in 2014, but you must plant the seeds this year and tend to them. For Gems that write, it’s all about writing, editing and pruning. Non-writing Gems, it’s about making sure that any ideas have the capacity feed others. Once you get past the Summer solstice, you have no more room for idle abstraction and if you continue to dwell in trivial pursuits, you’ll miss the mark. Bye the way, June is just way too much fun for a Gemini. Just giving you a heads up to rest up in say around April for the non-stop, giddy, tilt-a-whirl, synchronistic-poetry-slam fest of cocktails with lesser gods of many pantheons. Just letting you know far in advance and can I tag along for the ride? Even Gems have their serious and sober sides. That’s November for you. Throttle back and clear the lines so to speak. If you ever get bored (God forbid) take an Aries to lunch and get them to tell you about the next big thing to change our world. You won’t be disappointed.

CANCER

Ahhhh, my dear, sweet, loving and feeling Cancerian friends. If I were a preacher on a Sunday morning, mega-church broadcast, beaming to you from the heart of my plush and gilded cathedral in the center of a polytetrahedonic cathedral, I would say verily unto thee, “Rise, rise o yee battered and bruised, trampled and abused children of the sea, rise from your fetal state where you are just holding by the thinnest and sharpest point of your chipped and cracked claws. Rise up and feel the holy spirit move through you like a warm glow that spreads from root to fruit, from alpha to omega, rise, rise, your time for trial and tribulation draws to an end, while the rest of God’s children begin to bear share your bittersweet burden. In essence my brothers and sisters, it is time to lay down your crosses.” How does this sound? You’ve been down for way, way too long. First it was Pluto, then it was Saturn, then it was Uranus, all conspiring to crack that crabby shell, to make you move forward when sideways or even backwards would have been just fine, or when they forced you to leave your precious home. Starting this summer, the tide comes back in and you begin to float, rising to new levels of buoyancy. And here’s the kicker. While others are gripping you’ll be amazed by how calm, cool and collected you’ll be. For crabs whose beds and hearts are empty, that will change as well. Expect love to come rushing in along with the tide. Now that doesn’t mean that you’ll get a free pass in 2013, sorry. You’ll have to deal with the two, big time squares in May and November just like the rest of us, including and especially Aries, Libra and Cap, but the difference this year, is that you can handle them in a different way. While you won’t stare them down and beat them back, you’ll be up for working with the energy instead of it working you. In May, partnerships and work demand your attention and get you thinking about upgrades for both. In November, its fish or cut bait. You’re either moving up together or moving on. After that, the great big ocean awaits and you’ll be just fine either swimming together or alone.

LEO

2013 has the potential to be an uncharacteristically uneventful year and based on what I’m seeing for 2013, that may not be such a bad thing. Let’s cut right to the chase. You need to focus on home and I mean in a true, physical, not metaphysical or metaphoric sense. It’s not sexy, but you’ve got to get down beneath the surface of things. On a mundane level, we’re talking plumbing, pipes, water, septic systems . . . you get my drift. If you don’t deal with these dirty little details, it’s going to be more challenging for you in 2014 when you really get to step out and want nothing to do with such mundane affairs. But wait! There’s more. You also need to look into your mortgage, deeds, easements, you name it. Anything that is associated with your house that has a value attached to it, and has someone else’s signature from a lending or municipal institution you must pay attention. While you’re rooting around the pipes and papers, you’ll also take large chunks of timeout and guess what? You won’t miss what you think you’d miss. Just being honest here, 2013 “should” be a year where you re-charge, get stronger and go deeper. Past and future merge. Why are you here? What is Love? Where do you want to be in ten years? How can I paint my soul with tubes of liquid neon? How can I make the perfect bowl of Pho and so on? Mars does a turn in your sign at the end of your solar return. July through mid-October are peak months and a harbinger for what lies ahead for you from the Summer Solstice on in 2014, when your roar is heard loud and clear throughout the galaxy. My advice to you? Don’t press too much. Sit back and absorb life. Learn from children, the seasons and universal mothers, but make damn sure that where you lay your head is high, dry and yours.

VIRGO

Scorpio and Virgo are odd bedfellows. The sweet sextile between the two for the next year and beyond is actually quite supportive for both signs, but Virgo in particular. Virgos are closet doctors, nurses, herbalists and healers–well sometimes not so closeted. Saturn in Scorpio turns up the heat, healing and otherwise. Normally conservative Virgos will seek greater depth in any work they are consciously involved in, pushing them deeper into places outside of their comfort zone. If you happen to be said Virgo, this is your year to go deep sea diving. To stimulate your sense of adventure and natural imagination, I would suggest exploring the pictorial realms of the Abyssal Zone, where strange creatures live only off the thermal deep-sea vents and the microscopic detritus of sea life much closer to the surface. You’ll totally relate to the efficiency of these creatures, where their translucent forms reveal the most fundamental internal organs for digestion and yes, even pro-creation, where down in the dark, at PSI that would crush your skull like a grapefruit, these creatures mate, hatch their broods and perform a common ritual under unusually uncommon circumstances. It may be just some sort of strange genetic code or it might even be the most outrageous form of love that exists. The deep-sea vents are pure Scorpio, awash with the molten code of bio-magnetic effluvia, nurturing colonies psychedelic tubeworms, which preform some important role in the grand chain of life itself. These are your unusual totems for the days ahead and not just because you marvel at their simplicity–no–it’s because you marvel at their ability to adapt under harsh conditions and even thrive. They are a symbol for our time and you get it. On a more mundane note, you’re being asked to up your game during the two major squares of Uranus and Pluto in 2013. Be prepared to jack into the holodeck of career change if you need to or if for some reason (yes this could happen) you become redundant. Food trucks, ice cream stands, mobile massage, psychic troubleshooter. More autonomy and taking responsibility for what you do is going to be essential. Untangling old knots and tying new ones could also be very much in your future in 2013. Ring those bells!

LIBRA

I just spoke with a Libra friend who is on a crash course for turning herself into a high-priestess of some sort of eclectic and electric faith. She toned in the King’s Chamber on 12/21/12 and just a few weeks later cruised around Australia listening to and learning from Bruce Lipton, Greg Braden and Doreen Virtue. She hops around the globe like some people drive down to the 7-11 and the most amazing part? Well, I won’t give her alchemical secret away, well not too much, but she does some of it through selling thousands of miles of adhesive tape. She’s quietly one of the most influential people on the planet. Why? Because what she does helps hold the world together–literally. And therein lies the deeper subtext for you in 2012. As part of the cardinal cross club, you are being stretched like no other time. Uranus is giving you a sense of urgency, pushing you to find the now within the now, occasionally jamming your Venusian cool, especially in relationships. Capricorn demands that you examine your habit as a grace junkie, while Jupiter this summer urges you to find that sweet, vocational spot where you absolutely love what you do. Not terribly demanding–is it? And through it all, you are aware of your resources in a way that you have never been aware before. It’s in the air you know. Americans are saving at record levels and your normally whimsical self gets some wake up calls in 2013, especially in May when the 11/11 square hits. If I were you, I’d double my assets in hard metals just prior to this time. Up through June, Libras have tremendous popularity–use it wisely and well–forward programs and projects that are near and dear to your heart. You’re one of the great networkers of the zodiac. Don’t stop now. If you somehow manage to miss a few steps along the way, don’t stress out, because next year, the TN shifts into your sign and you become the most important person in the room without really trying.

SCORPIO

Whenever I get to Scorpio on the scopes, I feel like I’m headed for the home stretch, rounding the corner and yet, in some ways, I’m convincing myself that I am almost there when I still have to deconstruct four more signs in a unique, compelling and hopefully helpful fashion. In essence, let’s not get too far ahead of ourselves. Dig? That is the message for you right now and I think for us collectively, since agents of Scorpio hold the key. Cloak and dagger, revelation, ripping back the curtain to reveal the tiny man with the microphone (no, not Bob Costas). So this is who you are and what’s happening, your stinger is like a hook, perhaps a Sandy Hook? This is the year where the Pluto in Scorpio kids have Saturn crossing their Pluto. It’s an intense maturation process that’s happening at a freakish speed, almost like species mutation. We’re in the collective Saturn cycle now and the next 15 years will be marked by greater societal change than what’s taken place in the last 15 if you can believe it and you dear Scorp will begin to feel these social tremors long before anyone else. When Saturn begins the cycle of crossing your Sun, it’s a new beginning, a re-set and for you, shedding your skin in the year of the snake is a natural fit, or unfit. But no matter how this year unfolds for you, you are the point person for truth. Just look at what’s happened since Saturn has moved into your sign; Gerry Sandusky sentenced, Jimmy Saville exhumed, Petraeus and Broadwell (both Scorpios) busted. You are going through your own deep revelations, exposing conspiracies of self, scandals rocking your own identity and that’s the way it should be. No stone gets unturned as they roll away. In doing so, you assume a moral authority that is uncommon and your presence is a field of naked discovery. For those that are open and clear, it creates a rare space of deep intimacy and recognition, for those that aren’t, well they might not stick around for very long, but that’s you. Those that love you are drawn to you and those that fear you are repelled. 2013? Sounds like business as usual.

SAG

Don’t worry archers, your temporary state of ADD is winding down (thank God) and while it’s given you many brainstorms, those precious thought seeds haven’t quite sprouted yet. As Jupiter moves forward, so do your plans and projects (thank God), but while your brains get scrambled back together like some reconstructed desert out of the mind of Ferran Adria, there’s a deeper, parallel energy that’s taking place at the same time, so consider 2013 an exercise in patience, a journey to the dark side of the Sun on occasion, well more than on occasion actually, but that’s a minor detail. What’s a major detail is Uranus and how it’s lighting up a sense of possibility, especially as it relates to your sense of what’s possible from a creative place. April is off the charts for you, so even if you’re doing time on Saturn, in April, you get sprung, trust me on this. But the overall quality for you in 2012 is about the acquisition of wisdom. We’re not talking run of the mill, good old Sag pontificating, nope, we’re talking deep diving, shamanic death and rebirth kind of wisdom, the stuff that’s so unshakable that you simply transmit it with a look, a glance, a gesture, but the only way to get there, the only way that you can attain this precious gift that initiates of secret orders sell their should for, is to die to your conception of how the world “should” be. This isn’t always easy for a sign that can exhibit strong powers of optimism and faith, but it’s the only through to the other side. You’re greatest obstacle, aside from your own fear, is your choice to pre-maturely abort your mission due to a sudden case of terminal cynicism. It’s not the easiest of passages, but what’s life without a little adventure? An Ivory/Merchant film on Zoloft. So bear up, pull up your big boy and big girl pants and set forth. Oh yeah, did I mention that one of the most terrifying things you’ll be staring down this year is your own aloneness? Well, there’s a cure for that. It’s called marriage. LOL I told you that you had to face your the annihilation of your concept of the world. I never said you would end up alone with all that magnificent gnosis, now did I?

CAPRICORN

I just finished watching, “Get The Gringo” with one, Capricorn, Mel Colm-Cille Gerard Gibson, yes, the Road Warrior himself. It’s a classic picaresque of Capricornian proportions. Mel’s character is on the bad end of $2,000,000.00 theft, getting busted by the Mexican border patrol with the majority of the cash. He winds up in a quasi-barrio prison, where he quickly rises to prominence inside the prison culture due to his street smarts and ex-military training. By the end of the film, he’s doling out vengeance, saving a mamacita and her chain-smoking nine, while pocketing close to $1.5 mill. from his original theft. The reason I’m sharing this with you is because in some ways, Mel’s film will mirror your life. Not the getting your balls kicked out you scene, nor the reaching for the gun in the crap filled toilet scene, but the overall arc of the character and the story. It’s about overcoming odds through a series of challenges, trials and adversity, often in strange places, with people you barely understand. Yes, I’m talking about the work place. You see, Mel’s character develops a plan and modifies it accordingly based on his available resources and and ever shifting topography of allies. We’re in year four of when Pluto first went into Capricorn, so you’ve had some time to adjust to the intensity and gravitas, the sudden change and the deeply thorough blasts of transformation rippling through your sign. If you’re a Capricorn boss, chances are that you’ve had to lay people, good people off at some point over the past three years. If you deal with money, chances are that you had to reject loans, call them in or flat out remove someone from their premises. If you’re in education, chances are that you had to shut down programs due to lack of funding and yet you survived, even thrived while you watched others fall by the wayside. Some of you might have twinges of survivor guilt, while other Caps just know that this is par for the course and the reason why, is that you understand cycles and time almost better than any other sign and you know that the wheel will turn for some and if you have the opportunity to help (this might be that year) then you will act as an agent of redemption, a silent savior of sorts, balancing out the karmic checkbook of the universe in your own inimitable way. Don’t stop, don’t give up now. Another famous Capricorn, David Bowie is about to release his first album in ten years. It’s going to be an affirmation of his life and in 2013, after the intensity you have been through, you’ll have some affirmation for your own.

AQUA

Coming down the back stretch here boys and girls, I’m feeling giddy, my first post of 2013 and I went for the epic, 5,000 word production. And you wondered why it took me so long? Enough about me, let’s talk about you. I’m concerned about you Aquarius, in fact I even fear for you in some ways. In 2013, each sign will have it’s own unique temptation and test; it is the year of the devil and death. My concern for you is that somewhere along the way, oh shall we say May, that your spirit will take on a heavy aspect. Now this aspect won’t have as much to do with your life as it does your relationship with life. I’m concerned that you will view the events of the world at large in a way that shifts your forward thinking and progressive attitude to something more practical and reasonable. While this sounds good on paper, don’t fool yourself; it could the first step towards a complete rationalization of abandoning your dreams. In fact, you might even be tempted by something like a new job or a grant or something that looks good on the surface but if you’re truly honest with yourself, you’ll realize that you’re lying to yourself and the most subtle reason is, is that you’re scared, You’re scared of the way that the world is turning and you want to be on the right side of that change. Oh, I’m sure some shiny new project or assignment might sound convincing at the time, but sit with it and you’ll see where you’re holding out. So the question is, what do you do? How do you maintain your sense of purpose and hope? How do you retain your power? How can you avoid the subtlest self-sabotaging coup of your consciousness? Here’s my advice. Don’t buy into the bullshit. Don’t get down. Hold fast to the inner flame that guides you, because once the Solstice rolls around, nurturing your purpose is of outmost importance, The great thing about this arrangement is that you’ll show us how it’s done. Once you lock in on your purpose, and use some of that brilliant, yet fixed tunnel vision, the world begins to recede. The reason why I’m sharing this with you, is that I don’t want your sweet genius to fall into wrong hands, because if I’ve forgotten to mention it. it’s going to be off the freaking charts. Lastly, practice charity in a responsible fashion. Help out the world and the world in turn will assist you.

PISCES

Last but not least, the sweet fish swims into action this year, dauntless, yet aware of the big, very big picture. In a world that is fraught with seemingly more and more illusion on a daily basis, Pisces is just finding its sweet spot in the current of high strangeness. “Welcome to my world” the mermaid whispers. While others see you as anything from a flake to St. Bernadette, its because of all signs, you are the one most prone to the projection of others extreme hopes and fears. That changes this year. People around you, from your immediate family to your FB friends, they finally start to get you, finally realize that you’re not crazy and that all those crazy conspiracy theories and tripped out visions you’ve been having, night be that strange after all. Yes, the world is finally catching up to you. We’re not sure if this is a good or bad thing quite honestly for the rest of us, but for you, unfazed and blithely swimming into the dark waters of an uncertain future. Every sign needs a strategy, even yours, so what should you do? How can you maximize your experience, as a tsunami of change is about to crash down upon all of us? Go deeper. While everyone is rising to the surface, seeking superficial answers and quick fixes, you need to go into the opposite direction, because 2013 lines up for you like no other year has for at least a decade. Plunge. Explore your art. Dive into your creativity. While the world screams lack, you serve up baked kale chips and ginger, lemon and beet shots. While the world has had it’s collective head separated from it’s body, get out your sketchbook and capture the unseen agents of fortitude and grace resting at their elbows, kneeling at their knees. While the lies get bigger than Kim Kardashian’s ass after six months of pregnancy, you’ll be a fountain of truth, no longer just a babbling brook, telling it like it is without any kind of fear, remorse or sense of repercussion. Yes, you are out collective hero in 2013. March is pure Nirvana. Soak it up. July brings a practicality to your dreams. Act on them. And November is a kind of reckoning and zero sum moment that has you out front, telling the rest of us that it’s going to be all right for a change. God bless you Pisces.

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In Jupiter in Gemini duality is resolved. . . . sort of.

I have been tempted to really get into the Jupiter in Gemini connection between Obama and Romney or O’Romney as many have dubbed it. Their positions on the big issues are completely identical (likely the small ones too). To think we have the opportunity to change the situation by voting for one candidate over another is simply ludicrous. People need to disabuse themselves of this quaint notion, like eight years ago. Its all bread and circus, reality show sweepstakes for the guy with the best hair, cut of the jaw or tightest suit. And that’s merely on the superficial level, where people are judging and apprising each candidates appeal. That’s just the surface of it all. Below the phony and staged back-and-forth of partisan bating and grinning finger pointing lies something much darker. The society of the spectacle is the front for a rigged reality and the illusion of choice. There are no two candidates that best exemplify this than O’Romney.

Flash back. It’s 2008 and out of a heated race between Hilary Clonetin, the consummate insider and Saul Alinsky disciple and Barack Obama, the great unknown and Saul Alinsky disciple, the latter emerged from the ocean of our consciousness, with hope breaking like a fresh wave of cool, clear, healing waters across the charred and singed hearts and minds of a nation, beset by Bush fires that are still burning, Set against the octogenarian poster child, for the silent generation, the choice for Americans was easy, even though Jupiter was in Capricorn and would have seemed to favor the old dude.

But that’s where Obama’s Jupiter was and having a Jupiter return all through an election year and you’re the guy, well it doesn’t get much better than that. The Carpricornian forces lined up behind him, while McCain would ably play his role as the dotty yet gritty foil. But this time with Jupiter in Gem, its a different beast.

Gemini is essentially two halves of one whole before they split and when they do, they’re twinned, doubles. So what do we have here with these two candidates?

On the surface they seem to conform to classic Gem duality. Black versus white. Humble means versus privileged. Left versus right. Woman and rights lover versus woman and rights denier. One guy sings Al Green while the other hums Pat Boone. The contrast is all too apparent. And yet, go just a few levels deeper and you’ll see the similarities emerge in stark terms as both co-sign in agreement with almost every big ticket item staring down the American electorate. In fact, even NPR has noticed the similarities. Again, Gemini in all its alchemical glory reveals itself to be different and yet the same, two but really one. It offers the maya of choice and the stark revelation that no matter what you do or where you punch your chad, there is no change. And that my friends, is the desired effect.

When people are confronted with this option, they hold their noses, close their eyes, look the other way and vote based on their conscience, however much remains of that precious failsafe of the soul. They’ll co-sign on the lesser of two evils and in this case . . . .well you do the math. Some people are still misguided albeit well meaning. They see candidate A as the peoples champion. He stands for all the right things even if his voting record, now conspicuous, clearly suggests something entirely different. But there’s photos of him puffin’ some choom with a wide brimmed Panama, looking for all intents and purposes like a Hawaiian cast member of “Dazed And Confused.” Yes, he’s quite human isn’t he? Well talk about cognitive dissonance. Ask any member of the cannabis community and they’ll tell you how the Feds have made life a living hell in California for distributors and users of medicinal marijuana, shutting them down right and left. This is how people go nuts by the way. Not immediately or directly but quickly enough, especially now. Because the image and the action are so far from matching up, that its maddening.

Then you’ve got candidate B, passing himself off as the peoples champion, even if he can’t seem to get any more than 500 people at a time to watch him stiffly exhort his action plan to bring America back. He’s a died-in-the-wool globalist who will do the bidding of the highest bidder. Unlike candidate A who bobs and weaves around the medical marijuana issue, candidate B will only sign off on synthetic marijuana, which is where big pharma is poised to make the big bucks on cannabis research. But everyone knows that synth herb is crap and robs the healing properties right out of God’s own green. I said i wouldn’t talk about them and here I am, pecking away.

Okay, so lets end the debate and just have a peek at how similar they are on where they stand on the most important issues of this very pivotal era in our history.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY OCTOMOM!

Let’s lighten the mood a bit and indulge in a little astro-whimsy. Today was the birthday of one, Nadya Suleman. Who is she? “Ocotmom.” I keep wondering if she’s some dark illuminist project, like Isis on aderall and andro. Well she is a Cancer so the mother thing is, well, in her chart, but she’s like some transhumanist pet project gone rogue, spitting out 14 kids by the time she was 37. They came in batches thanks to a hopped-up-hormonal system, flush with fertility drugs, splitting zygotes like pairs-of-eights in Vegas.

Octomom just kept doubling down.

Now to be fair, she was having a hard time conceiving because of fibroid tumors and scarring, so she had to resort to the miracles of modern medicine and go IVF (In Vitro Fertilization). To make ends meet and pay for her IVF, she worked in a psych hospital. Her first child was the product of donated friend sperm. The child was named “Elijah.” Now one might think that this would satiate her need to conceive. Nope. She was just getting started. Amerah, Joshua, and Aidan followed. That’s four kids. Enough? Nope. Double down! Twins!

Calyssa and Caleb. Now we’re talking six. Enough? No frickin’ way. By this time she’s like the Spielberg of birth, working up to that blockbuster production, the Indiana Jones of all pregnancies and on 1/26/09, in the early degrees of Aquarius (Sun conjunct Moon), out popped Noah, Maliyah, Isaiah, Nariyah, Jonah, Jeremiah and Josiah. The True Node and Jupiter were also in on the act, conjuncting Sun/Moon. I’m sensing that these kids are either going to save the planet in spite of their birth obsessed mom, or she’s just hatched the children of the damned as part of the great plan to bring the whole thing down and Arthur C. Clarke is somehow involved in all of this. Chiron is also in the mix in Aquarius (really?) but far enough out so that those sweet conjunctions are mostly spared the indignity of being too self-conscious about their future as a sideshow act.

They have Uranus conjunct Venus in Pisces, 20/21 degrees. They also have Mercury conjunct Mars in Cap, 21/26. Here’s the real treat, Pluto exact Black Moon Lilith in Capricorn. Birth (Pluto) and the new Eve, conceiving through some whacky, Atlantean-Aquarian science magic.

But what about mom? Black Moon Lilith casting her revenge on Eve incarnate?

Well, for starters, she’s got Sun/Saturn conjunct 19/22 in Cancer in the 5th House. Anyone with even a cursory knowledge of astrology can do the math here. In the house of children (Leo), she has the sign of the mother (Cancer) tied to the mule of labor in Saturn also in of course, Cancer. One might say, it was her destiny to be a mother–but this much? Zoom out and there’s a T-Square with Uranus in Libra in the 8th House and Jupiter in Aries in the 2nd. Uranus in the 8th is, well unusual circumstances around partnering (Libra) and sex and birth. Squaring Jupiter, is well, maybe just a bit too much of it. Both planets squaring her Sun, well, that’s willful excess (Jupiter in Aries) and submerged strangeness (Uranus in Libra). It all adds up to infamy masquerading as 21st century reality based fame.

As Saturn finally lurched forward in her 8th House, Ocotomom released a home-brew-porn vid of her pleasuring herself. You see, she believes that porn can be the ticket to help pay for her hungry brood. This might not go so well when Saturn hits her Uranus on 9/20, when by the way transiting Uranus and Pluto do their next square dance at 6 degrees. Maybe it might have to do with her strip club lawsuit. However, Octomom might just be the ultimate feminist, which could save her a visit from CPS, she’s a veritable birth engine, more of a Wankel rotary, than a traditional piston drive, and, she can do porn as well! Octomom might be the most fully realized woman in the feminist mold of all time. Is she done? Hardly. Just wait until Jupiter moves into Cancer next year and conjuncts her Sun/Saturn. Hit me babies one more time!!!

I haven’t even gotten into her obsession with Angelina Jolie. I’ll leave that one alone for now. Okay, we’ll get back to saving the universe from ourselves on the next post. Promise.

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